Friday, August 21, 2015

Baby Brady


He's here!  Our little Brady joined our family on August 18 at 7:50 am.  Despite measuring small for most of my pregnancy he weighed in at an impressive 7 lbs 1 oz and was 20 inches long.  We've had lots of people ask so here's how it all happened!

Kimber was born by emergency c-section.  It was intense, scary and PAINFUL.  When we found out we were pregnant again I asked my doctor if there was a chance I could have a VBAC (vaginal birth after csection).  She felt that my chances of a successful VBAC were good and was very supportive my entire pregnancy.

Two weeks ago we went in for my weekly check up and she was shocked to find that he had dropped to a -1 position.  She excitedly told me that he was in a GREAT position to attempt a vaginal delivery and that she felt he was getting ready to come join our family very soon.  That weekend I started having contractions.  Excitedly I told Shawn we were getting close and we started timing.  My contractions got to 6 min apart.  They were strong but not horribly painful.  They never got any closer.  Unfortunately they never stopped either... When I saw her a week ago I explained that I was having regular contractions that didn't seem to be progressing any further.  She ordered a non stress test to make sure Brady was handling them OK (which he was).  She decided to go ahead and strip my membranes that visit to see if we could help them progress further.  She excitedly told me "Hopefully we will see you in a few days!"

Well, she didn't... That weekend my contractions progressed to 5 1/2 minutes apart and were PAINFUL.  I fought myself trying to decide if this was the real deal, if I needed to go in to labor and delivery or not.  I couldn't sleep through them and it was impossible to get comfortable in any position but I decided that due to the fact that I could still talk and walk through them I would wait it out a little longer.  I kept waiting for the pain to peak and push me over the top of the hill into full labor but it never did.  I tried EVERYTHING to get this labor progressing but nothing I did could push them past the 5 1/2 minute spread.

The next time Dr Craig found me in her office (Monday) I told her how my weekend went.  I also informed her as she went to check my dilation that if she told me after all of these contractions I was still a two I was going to cry.  I took one look at her face and knew.... I was still a two... My insides felt like hamburger thanks to over crowding, a very active little boy and then two weeks worth of constant contractions.  To be very honest I was EXHAUSTED and could not imagine going in to labor already this sore and worn out.  It terrified me but we had other problems.

Dr Craig explained that her biggest concern was that he had gone from a -1 position (basically "engaged") to a -4 ("floating").  My little man seemed to be lost trying to find the exit!  She felt this was why my labor wasn't progressing.  She knew how badly I wanted a "normal" birthing experience and I could tell she was going to ultimately let me be the one to make this decision so I asked her what she felt my chances of a successful vaginal delivery were.  She told me that she felt right now that it was likely a 25-30% chance of success.  What did unsuccessful look like I asked her?  Basically the major concern is that as my contractions cause my cervix to soften and dilate it could cause my incision site to soften as well.  With a now "floating" baby the concern was that the scar could tear and part of the baby or cord could "float" out into the abdominal wall and it would instantly be life threatening for both baby and mama.  That was enough for me.  As badly as I didn't want to (and as terrified as it made me) we made the decision to schedule a c-section first thing the next morning.

That night I tucked my little Kimber Bean into bed as an only child for the last time.  She looked SO old and it tugged at my little mama heartstrings knowing that this chapter of our lives was closing and a whole new adventure was about to begin in just a few hours.  Two hours later I woke up with HARD contractions.  I went to the bathroom and realized that this was it.  My body had FINALLY decided to go in to full labor.  I called my mom, finished getting the last few things we needed together for our hospital stay and we left the house at 3:00 am almost three whole hours before when we were supposed to be at the hospital.  We got checked in and the nurse checked me and told me that I was dilated to a three and that indeed this was "the real deal".  For a moment I was tempted to just see where this laboring lead us to.  Maybe he would engage again and my "dream birth" would become a reality.  As soon as this thought entered my mind though the nurse commented "Huh, it's weird though because he is still WAY up there floating around..."  Ok, c-section here we come!

I labored for four hours before they took me back to the operating room.  Our anesthesiologist was a very nice guy who talked and joked and laughed with us through the whole pre-op process to help lighten the mood which I was grateful for.  As soon as I walked into the operating room though my whole body started to shake uncontrollably as memories of Kimber's very scary birth started coming back.  I was instantly very grateful I had taken Dr. Craig's advice to attend at least one counseling session to address some anxiety that might have been "shoved under the rug" for the past two years.  I am SO grateful for our wonderful nurse who recognized the signs of a total panic attack coming on.  She got right in my face and started talking to me squeezing my hands while the spinal block was placed.

Once they had me prepped and on the table Dr Craig walked in.  Her cheerful "Good Morning Nielsens!  Let's have a baby!" snapped me out of the memory loop I was stuck in and I was suddenly very aware of how different the atmosphere was.  Everyone was joking and laughing throwing out bets on what the weight of the baby would be.  We waited for a brief moment until I was totally numb (a very nice feature) and then we started.  I kept waiting for the intense pressure that I experienced with Kimber and was shocked when the anesthesiologist told me "Ok his head is out!  Get your camera ready, Dad!"
I was grateful Shawn was able to capture this photo.  Giving birth by c-section is just as much "giving birth" as a vaginal delivery.  Birth is incredible and miraculous.  Vaginal or c-section, natural or with the assistance of medication, none of these take away the miraculous part of giving life to another human.
A few minutes later I heard it.  A loud, healthy newborn cry.  I bawled.  They brought him around the surgical drape for me to see and he was already a bright and healthy pink.  They shouted out his Apgar scores of 9 and 10. The nurse laughed and said that she only sees about 3 tens given every year but this little guy definitely earned his.

Shawn brought him over and set him on my chest so I could hold him while they finished closing me up.  When we got out to the recovery room the nurse let me do skin to skin and when Brady instantly lifted his head and managed an impressive "scoot" towards my breast she told me to go ahead and let him latch.  I nursed him for 15 minutes before we moved to the mother baby ward.

As Brady's newborn screenings and test results started coming back our pediatrician actually laughed and said that they were almost "freaky perfect" which was such a contrast to Kimber's constant results of "Well she passed but just BARELY..."  The whole experience was SO drastically different from Kimber's.

Kimber LOVES being a big sister.  Their first meeting was PRICELESS.  Kimber insisted that he was HER baby and held him close and whispered secrets to him for a whole half hour.  I was worried this would wear off when she realized he was coming home with us but this morning I woke up to her walking over to his bassinet and saying "Oh hi Brady!  I be right back!"  She then brought him some of her favorite books.  There were times during this pregnancy where I worried that maybe we were having another baby too soon with all of Kimber's special needs.  Now that I see them together I am so glad we didn't wait to reunite these precious little spirits.  I'm sure they have been missing each other.

Our family has a lot of adjusting to do and it's been a little difficult with mom temporarily out of commission but we have wonderful family around us helping us.  I'm hoping my recovery is fast so we can start life in our new normal.

Thank you all so much for the prayers, messages, meals and offers to help!

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